Buses, Bank Cards and Prostitutes. Only Less Bank Cards
So here we are. Two weeks in and still out of jail. Barely. Oh, wait, solicitation isn’t illegal here. Is it?
I`m beat ya`ll. And not the Tina Turner kind when Ike comes home to a cold meal. But close. With an office filled of 22 countries worth of funny sounding jabber-jaws, five evenings out on the corporate dime (three of which were at the Beef Bar; boo-yah), six days of meetings and one nerve-wracking, programme-introducing presentation, I am officially wiped the fu*k out. Also, my liver hurts. Real bad.
Anyway, as I limp my way back to the apartment on Monday evening, I`m approached by a young woman. Reasonably well dressed, looking as if she just left the office, she walks up and, well, says something in French. Like they all do. Thinking she was looking for directions, or her dog, I`m left standing there, glazed, unfocused stare, obviously a few glasses beyond remembrance of how to say, “En Anglais,” she manages to politely articulate the words, “sex, you want sex?” followed by the placement of her fist in the air and the subsequent pumping of her hips exclaiming, “CHING CHING??” I politely thank her for thinking of me, and explain that I don’t get paid until Wednesday. See how empathetic I am?
On a more PG note, the bus rides are getting more dangerous. Tuesday evening, our bus driver managed to honk his horn one two many times at an overly confident teenager trying to make a U-turn. About three stops worth of him throwing his fist and what appeared to be, though nonsensical jibberish to me, naughty words out his window and torwards the instigating bus driver, he had finally had enough. Stopping his car in the middle of 1.5 lanes of traffic, bursting out of his door and into the open doors of the bus, he unleashed the proverbial wrath to the now safety glass-protected driver.
Followed by the panic stricken girlfriend riding shotgun, the bus driver calmly closed the bus doors. And drove off.
With him still on the bus.
Funny, yes. But sad that his girlfriend couldn’t drive down to the next stop to pick his ass up.
No, wait, that part was funny too.
I`m beat ya`ll. And not the Tina Turner kind when Ike comes home to a cold meal. But close. With an office filled of 22 countries worth of funny sounding jabber-jaws, five evenings out on the corporate dime (three of which were at the Beef Bar; boo-yah), six days of meetings and one nerve-wracking, programme-introducing presentation, I am officially wiped the fu*k out. Also, my liver hurts. Real bad.
Anyway, as I limp my way back to the apartment on Monday evening, I`m approached by a young woman. Reasonably well dressed, looking as if she just left the office, she walks up and, well, says something in French. Like they all do. Thinking she was looking for directions, or her dog, I`m left standing there, glazed, unfocused stare, obviously a few glasses beyond remembrance of how to say, “En Anglais,” she manages to politely articulate the words, “sex, you want sex?” followed by the placement of her fist in the air and the subsequent pumping of her hips exclaiming, “CHING CHING??” I politely thank her for thinking of me, and explain that I don’t get paid until Wednesday. See how empathetic I am?
On a more PG note, the bus rides are getting more dangerous. Tuesday evening, our bus driver managed to honk his horn one two many times at an overly confident teenager trying to make a U-turn. About three stops worth of him throwing his fist and what appeared to be, though nonsensical jibberish to me, naughty words out his window and torwards the instigating bus driver, he had finally had enough. Stopping his car in the middle of 1.5 lanes of traffic, bursting out of his door and into the open doors of the bus, he unleashed the proverbial wrath to the now safety glass-protected driver.
Followed by the panic stricken girlfriend riding shotgun, the bus driver calmly closed the bus doors. And drove off.
With him still on the bus.
Funny, yes. But sad that his girlfriend couldn’t drive down to the next stop to pick his ass up.
No, wait, that part was funny too.
